Monday, 31 December 2012

Traffic Lights {16}

Our beloved readers & followers, we wish you all a wonderful new year filled with happiness, success and love. This post is dedicated to each and every one of you! 
Happy new year!

I woke up from the constant ringing of my alarm. I turned around and switched it off. Stay positive Jawaher, today is going to be a good day! I jogged out of the apartment once I was done with with an apple in my mouth. I had to get there before the roads get busy and I made it on time. I got in the back entrance of the hall and sat in my seat. Mia, Momoko and Alfie were there. Yousef wasn’t.
Where’s Vladimir? I asked them all. No one replied. They would change the topic, which made me scared. Surely everything’s fine, but where is he?
Alfie, where’s Vladimir? I stared at his facial expressions a slight change would give me a clue, but I saw nothing.
I’ll call him now love, don’t worry. We need to get you ready.
I was informed that I was the first model to walk down the runway isle, and then walk again at the middle and was the last one. The makeup artist went for sultry red lips that was bold and defined the look with femininity; my eyes had a basic eye shadow and a solid cat eyeliner. I wore the opening dress, which was black with daring cutouts and by daring I mean revealing and would sure make you fall head overs heels for this gown. It had a split by the thigh to expose more flesh to make it even sexier. The back details spoke a language of ravishingly intriguing womanliness; the front has sheer side panels that gave an illusion of depth and unbelievable sexy curves.
I’ll walk so proudly that everyone will envy me.
Every step I took I knew what I was about to do was life changing and there’s no turning back. I wonder what’ll happen when they get to see my pictures all over the place, what will my relatives back in Dubai say? Oh well, who cares. The curtains were pulled back and I was ready to walk. The music played, and here we go! I walked towards the end of the isle, with every step a shot of painful memories hit me, I stopped by the end and counted to three I turned around and walked back in. As the three of them rushed me in to change my clothes I looked around, searching, hoping that I would find that familiar face. But I saw nothing.
The second dress was something Grace Kelly would wear, or perhaps Audrey Hepburn. It was cut in a way that the plunging neckline and back would surely keep you staring for a long time; and the colour is so gorgeous, blood red it was designed to stun people, to take you back in time and yearn for it. I was so proud of who I was, I finally felt that I’ve achieved something in this life of mine, now the whole world knows who I am. 
The final dress, oh the final dress, it is so beautiful and so simple it makes me want to cry. That’s how sexy it is. It’s a white long sleeved dress, with the neckline cut so long; it reached the center end of my ribcage. The creamy brown fur shawl sat quietly by my shoulder to complete the look. My hair was pulled back into a neat bun. My makeup remained untouched but the lipstick was substituted into a dark maroon red. It was the kind of look that remains in your memory for a very long time. I walked down that isle one last time knowing that after this show I am going to resign. Au revior modeling.
As I turned, walking my way back there he was. Stealing every breath I take, I wanted to run back to him and leap into his arms. Just a few more steps and my smile ripped as wide as they could as he stood there with his arms wide opened. I love him!
I’m so proud of you.
I remained in his arms as the curtains closed and the crowd stood up and clapped for us.
I love you.
He held my hand and walked me back. There was an after party that was going to take place after the results were going to be revealed. Yousef told me to stay in the white dress and I did.
Jawaher! We did it!!! We won! He was so happy, he hugged me so tight then kissed me. I love you.
I love you so much you’ll never understand. Yousef, I quit modeling.  He smiled and kissed me once more then we headed to the party. He did not bother arguing with me about me quitting and I was happy that he didn’t say anything about it.

The party was hectic; strangely a few people came to me so I can sign my autograph, which slightly made me feel overwhelmed. A couple of new designers wanted me to model for their fashion line but I apologized and said that I quit today after the show. I left the party at 2AM knowing I was pushing the limits. Yousef dropped me back. I unlocked the door and got in and headed towards my room. I slowly unzipped myself out of the dress and carefully hung it in my closet.

Had fun…?

I yelled because someone unexpectedly spoke. My eyes widened, I could feel goose bumps all over my body.
Oh god, that was unexpected… 

Friday, 14 December 2012

Traffic Lights {15}

It has been three days and sleep was becoming my enemy. I barely slept, and I would wakeup regretting the day Aibileen left. It has been three days and she did not text or call, its like I completely vanished from her life. I couldn’t spend the three days on my own, my life was on repeat; get out of bed, go to university, go to the atelier, come back to the apartment. Time was ironically flying but I felt every minute. And as the days passed by, the runway was getting closer and closer. Everyday I would practice with the girls – Momoko and Mia. Right after university, Yousef would pick me up and we’d go out for lunch and then go to the atelier.
One night, he spent the entire time with me. We had a movie marathon, watching his favourite movies and in between we’d chat a little. I’d know him more and he’d know me more. I love it when he wraps his arms around me, when I’d listen to the sound of his heartbeat and to his stories. I love him; I really do, but whenever I think of something Aibileen’s words seem to pop up, make me reconsider things twice. 
We were only a few days away, away from the runway. Surprisingly Yousef had to travel, he did not tell me where but there was something in his eyes, he was hiding something and I didn’t want to force him. If there was something, he would let me know. He didn’t tell me when he’d be back; I actually knew nothing about his trip. Alfie and Momoko came over a couple of times to pick me up from university and we’d walk together to the atelier.
We were a day away from the runway. And I thanked god it was on a weekend, I’d be able to rest. Yousef called me a couple of times in the past few days but he didn’t call today, and I called him but he didn’t answer. Alfie picked me up from university and we walked together.
You know Jawaher, I’m so glad you and Yousef are together. I looked at him and slowed down my pace. How did he know his real name?
Trust me, I’m Yousef’s oldest friend. In fact, we came here together, pursuing the same dream. I haven’t seen him this happy in a very long time, I’m sure he told you about his past and you know what he’s been through. I smiled. His words made me feel better. I didn’t know that the two of them were best friends and I didn’t know that Yousef’s love towards me was obvious.
Now that the dress is done, what would you like to do?
I don’t know. I called Yousef earlier and he didn’t reply. Is he all right?
Yeah, he just has to finish off some business.
Where’d he go?
He didn’t say… C’mon doll, let’s get some sushi! I spent the rest of the evening with Alfie. Momoko and Mia joined us later on. I excused myself and left early so I could have some good night sleep for tomorrow’s big day.
Before I went to bed, I took some pills so I can sleep then I sent two texts one to Aibileen and one to Yousef.

Dearest Aibileen,
I hope you are enjoying your holiday. The past week has been one of the worst in my entire life. I really miss you; I hope I see you sometime soon.
Lots of Love
Your one and only,

I stared at the message for minutes. Should I send it the way it is? No no no Jawaher, be strong. ‘You’ve got to pick yourself up and keep walking.’

Dearest Aibileen,
I hope you are enjoying your holiday. I really miss you; I hope I see you sometime soon.
Lots of Love
Your one and only,

That’s more like it. I pressed the send button and worked on Yousef’s message. I didn’t know how to begin…
To the one I love the most,
I hope everything’s all right. I miss you dearly. I hope you have a safe flight back.
Love now & forever,
Your Jawaher.

Tomorrow, hopefully, it will be a good day. Tomorrow, I’ll show the world what I’m made of. Tomorrow, oh god, please let Aibileen and Yousef come back.