Traffic Lights {15}

It has been three days and sleep was becoming my enemy. I barely slept, and I would wakeup regretting the day Aibileen left. It has been three days and she did not text or call, its like I completely vanished from her life. I couldn’t spend the three days on my own, my life was on repeat; get out of bed, go to university, go to the atelier, come back to the apartment. Time was ironically flying but I felt every minute. And as the days passed by, the runway was getting closer and closer. Everyday I would practice with the girls – Momoko and Mia. Right after university, Yousef would pick me up and we’d go out for lunch and then go to the atelier.

One night, he spent the entire time with me. We had a movie marathon, watching his favourite movies and in between we’d chat a little. I’d know him more and he’d know me more. I love it when he wraps his arms around me, when I’d listen to the sound of his heartbeat and to his stories. I love him; I really do, but whenever I think of something Aibileen’s words seem to pop up, make me reconsider things twice. 

We were only a few days away, away from the runway. Surprisingly Yousef had to travel, he did not tell me where but there was something in his eyes, he was hiding something and I didn’t want to force him. If there was something, he would let me know. He didn’t tell me when he’d be back; I actually knew nothing about his trip. Alfie and Momoko came over a couple of times to pick me up from university and we’d walk together to the atelier.

We were a day away from the runway. And I thanked god it was on a weekend, I’d be able to rest. Yousef called me a couple of times in the past few days but he didn’t call today, and I called him but he didn’t answer. Alfie picked me up from university and we walked together.

You know Jawaher, I’m so glad you and Yousef are together. I looked at him and slowed down my pace. How did he know his real name?

Trust me, I’m Yousef’s oldest friend. In fact, we came here together, pursuing the same dream. I haven’t seen him this happy in a very long time, I’m sure he told you about his past and you know what he’s been through. I smiled. His words made me feel better. I didn’t know that the two of them were best friends and I didn’t know that Yousef’s love towards me was obvious.

Now that the dress is done, what would you like to do?

I don’t know. I called Yousef earlier and he didn’t reply. Is he all right?

Yeah, he just has to finish off some business.

Where’d he go?

He didn’t say… C’mon doll, let’s get some sushi! I spent the rest of the evening with Alfie. Momoko and Mia joined us later on. I excused myself and left early so I could have some good night sleep for tomorrow’s big day.

Before I went to bed, I took some pills so I can sleep then I sent two texts one to Aibileen and one to Yousef.

Dearest Aibileen,

I hope you are enjoying your holiday. The past week has been one of the worst in my entire life. I really miss you; I hope I see you sometime soon.

Lots of Love

Your one and only,

Jawaher.

I stared at the message for minutes. Should I send it the way it is? No no no Jawaher, be strong. ‘You’ve got to pick yourself up and keep walking.’

Dearest Aibileen,

I hope you are enjoying your holiday. I really miss you; I hope I see you sometime soon.

Lots of Love

Your one and only,

Jawaher.

That’s more like it. I pressed the send button and worked on Yousef’s message. I didn’t know how to begin…

To the one I love the most,

I hope everything’s all right. I miss you dearly. I hope you have a safe flight back.

Love now & forever,

Your Jawaher.

Tomorrow, hopefully, it will be a good day. Tomorrow, I’ll show the world what I’m made of. Tomorrow, oh god, please let Aibileen and Yousef come back.